One Last Day with Gracie

My heart is crushed.

Gracie bit Maddie last week.

Since the day we brought Maddie home from the hospital, I've always said if Gracie ever bit her, we would have to do something.  

And while it makes sense logically and the mother bear in me wants to protect Maddie from any harm, this is really hard.  

Maddie still associates coming home to seeing Gracie.  

Yesterday she ran through the door and called out, "Gace, whereareoooo?"

I told her there would be a day when we came home and Gracie wouldn't be here anymore.

She said, "Sick?" 

I told her yes, Gracie is sick and we're going to have to tell her bye.

I'm going to miss her so much. 

Maddie Makes Her Own Egss!

So, the blog has been a little light on Maddie-pics lately.  

There's a good reason why!

I've been working on a video project and shooting videos instead!! 

I'm so excited about this project.  

I was very inspired by Hailey Bartholomew on Creative Live so I'm joining the challenge to create a video of 30 days of gratitude!!

Here's a couple of my favorite clips from last week...

I Have a Theory...

I have been instructed by my #1 blog fan (Maddie's Daddy) to get back to the subject of Maddie! 

I know that's why you guys tune in as well : ) 

I am working on creating a new blog devoted solely to photography so that will be coming soon!  

But back to Maddie...

I have a theory that no matter what you make/sew/craft for your child, they are going to love it.  

I have the perfect example to prove my hypothesis.  (wow, digging into grade-school science!)

A couple of years ago I attempted to sew Maddie a bath robe.  

I considered it an epic fail, but for whatever reason, Maddie loved it.  

This morning after bath, she once again proved her love for her bath robe.  

It's not hard to recognize when Maddie's excited about something.  

She expresses it with her whole being.  

I haven't attempted any repairs, so it's still very disheveled. 

She plays with the straggling strings...

and the tie is still held together with a safety pin.

but the girl loves it.  

It has to be simply because I made it.  

That's my theory and I'm sticking to it!! 

Photography Angles

 Look Granny!!  My Christmas cactus finally bloomed!

My Granny has the most amazing sun room full of beautiful plants and flowers.

She cut a clipping of one of her cactus plant for me and I put it in the wrong part of the house.  

It wasn't getting enough sunlight and I almost killed it!!

Luckily, I moved it to a different location and nursed it back to health.  

I was so delighted to find its first bloom!!!

So, I decided to photograph it.  

I tried to find as many different angles as possible to see what I liked best.  

Here's an example of just 12!  

Rather than just choose one or two favorites, I kind of like how they all fit together for a collage. 

Next time you go to photograph something, see how many different angles you can get!
You might find some that surprise you : )
 

She Has a Good Heart!

Maddie went to see her cardiologist today.  

Not only does she have a good heart spiritually, but physically as well!  

The main issue we've had since she was born is a tiny hole in her heart.  

Although it's not a huge concern, we've been hoping it would close up on its own. 

No such luck.  

Unfortunately it's still there.  

There's nothing that we will do to address the issue while she's young.  

It may cause problems as an adult.  

If she develops migraines or has a stroke, it will have to be surgically closed.  

Other than that, her heart is great!  

She did so well for her appointment today.

After the nurse took her blood pressure she told him thank-you. 

She gave herself a round of applause after sitting so still while the Dr. listened to her heart.

While the ECHO technician was working on getting a reading, Maddie gave her arm a gentle hug. 

.   

 

A good, good heart indeed!  : )

Kansas City Trip

Somehow I've gotten behind on blogging!

Since we weren't able to see Kyle's family at Christmas, we went up for a visit a couple of weekends ago.

I still haven't posted pictures yet!  

So, here goes. 

We went to the zoo, which oddly enough, was the most beautiful spring-like day right in the middle of January!

We decided to treat it like a mini-photoshoot so I could get some more practice in.  

It was fun!!

These are the kind of shots you can get when you use the concrete sidewalk as a reflector.

  Even with the cap on, there are no shadows hiding his eyes! : )  

As soon as Maddie saw the carousel, there was no way she was passing it by!  

There were lots of little spots for good portraits along the way...

I just love the backlighting on these shots!!

Still practicing reflections...

Play time with daddy while walking to the elephants!

Gotta stop for a snack...

and finally, picture with Grandma and Grandpa!

Silent Grief

A lot of people have asked how I'm doing since the miscarriage.  

Sometimes, I honestly don't know.  

When it first happened, I just wanted to quickly close the chapter and move on.  

But... Grief has a way of letting its presence be known.  

I learned this wasn't something that could be shoved down and forgotten.  

I know nothing about long-suffering.

I'm one of those people its easy to hate because everything always works out for me.  

I live with sunshine, rainbow-filled days overflowing with optimism and oozing joy. 

Grief is new.

Grief is foreign.

I feel it expanding my understanding and stretching my humanity. 

It's not the type of grief that threatens to take over.

It's more of a silent grief that shows up in the single, solitary tear that falls when I'm alone.  

I'm learning through the wise mentoring of several ladies from my Ladies Bible Study group that grief is something that stays with you always, changing who we are and how we see the world.  

I don't need to understand why.

I do need to embrace the grieving process and learn as much as I can along the way.  

Thank you for all of the wise counsel and prayers!  

I may consider this a silent grief, but it helps to know through your connection and prayer, I'm not alone.

And I have found so much healing there.